Sasuke, why is there a stick up your ass?
by Birdie Don't Eat That Muffin
Summary: Naruto has now shown us the stupidness of making a bet... Oh but what KIND of bet is it? READ AND FIND OUT! lemon and yaoi. boyxboy. SasuNaru


Okay this is my first fanfic. This is not my idea, but my friend was telling me a story about something she read on the Internet, but it wasn't She was telling me of this story but she didn't give me any details. The only thing she told was that she read a story online where Sasuke had a stick up his ass. Plus she told me this story a while ago so it's not really fresh in my mind. I am not taking credit for the idea of this story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or the characters.

R&R. I want to know how my first fic goes. I don't mind if you just come out and tell me this sucks. I do NOT want people telling me that they don't like the SasuNaru pairing because I really don't care. I don't' want your opinion on anything except this fic unless you're telling me that you love SasuNaru too!

Enjoy!

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"I hate all of you so go fuck yourselves," Uchiha Sasuke stated as he walked away. The raven-haired boy could never understand why he ever put up with Naruto's friends. Sasuke continued to walk away until it seemed that he was no longer in sight.

"What the hell is his problem? Does he have to be all emo? It's like there's a stick lodged up his ass," Kiba said.

Neji shook his head, "Someone needs to get that damned stick out."

Naruto's head shot up. "I can do it, I can do it! Sasuke won't stand a chance against me!"

Shikamaru stared at Naruto with disbelief. "Psh, yea you wish you could. Sasuke would beat your face in if you even came close to him. He'd kill you if he knew you were trying to find a stick up his ass."

Naruto hated when people underestimated him. It always made him get insanely pissed off.

"I can do it! You just watch! Believe it! I'll bet you all fifty dollars(1) that I can get that stick out of his ass by tomorrow." Naruto all but yelled.

Of course, Naruto is very dense. There is no way there is a stick up Sasuke's ass, (As far as we know that is.) but Naruto just _has_ to try. He's just _that_ determined. He had been planning a scheme for some time now.

Once everyone had agreed on the bet and that they would meet there at the same time, Naruto took off in the same direction as Sasuke. After rounding the corner, he bumped into an extremely pissed off Uchiha whom had heard every single word of their little bet.

"Naruto! Why the hell would you bet on that?"

"Well… I have a plan…"

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Naruto walked around the corner and arriving at their meeting spot. He began waving a very large stick in the air. This stick was not small. It looked like a branch from far away. But up close it could have passed off as a tree. Naruto noticed he was the last one to arrive.

"Okay everyone, I got it! Pay up!" Naruto shouted. Everyone stared wide-eyed at the stick. Kiba was the first of them to speak up.

"What the fuck is _that_?" the loud-mouthed boy shouted.

"This is the stick that was up Sasuke's ass." Naruto replied calmly. They were both unaware of Shikamaru and Neji quietly whispering a few feet away.

"Okay there is no way that, that stick came out of Sasuke's ass. He must be lying," Shikamaru mumbled quietly so that he was not heard.

"Duh, that's because there isn't really a stick. I'm sure that he just picked it up on his way here," Neji replied coolly. The two of them stood up and faced the two arguing boys.

Shikamaru broke them apart and asked, "Naruto do you have any actual proof that you got that stick out of-" Just then, Sasuke walked around the same corner with a _smile_ on his face saying stuff that would never come out of his mouth.

"Puppies... Flowers... Unicorns... World Peace... Love"

All of the guys (not including Sasuke and Naruto) gaped at Sasuke who was listing off all kinds of things that should never come out of Sasuke's mouth, ever.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT PUT THE STICK BACK NOW!!"

"Hahaha. I told you I would win. Pay up!" Naruto held out his hand.

"Nice try Naruto, but how exactly did you get that stick?" questioned Neji after regaining his composure. Naruto looked at the boy for a moment before whispering quietly, "Uhm yeah you do **not** wanna know. It took me a really long time…"

"Okay so now that I got the stick out of his ass, everyone PAY UP!" Naruto shouted.

After everyone had paid Naruto their fifty dollars, Shikamaru calmly said, "Well now he's starting to scare us. Take him away and get the old Sasuke back before we all kill ourselves from insanity." He was still staring at Sasuke, who was now walking around with a glazed look in his eyes.

Naruto began pulling Sasuke towards the Uchiha Mansion, about a few blocks away. Once the two boys were completely out of sight, Sasuke pushed Naruto up against the nearest wall, and smashed their lips together in a bruising kiss. Sasuke held Naruto's arms above his head so that he couldn't try to run. Sasuke was the first to break away from the kiss. He bent down slightly and whispered into Naruto's ear, "Hn, dobe are you ready to hold up your part of the deal?"

Flashback 

"Naruto! Why the hell would you bet on that?"

"Well… I have a plan…"

"Oh yeah, well let's hear it dobe."

"Fine, I don't exactly have a plan, but Tsunade hasn't been giving me any good missions so I'm barely getting paid. I have to buy my ramen. C'mon teme, I really need the money. If you do this for me, I'll do almost anything for you in return."

At this Sasuke smirked evilly.

End Flashback 

Naruto stared wide-eyed at Sasuke and stuttered, "What do you mean teme?" He never expected Sasuke to kiss him. Naruto had always had a little crush on Sasuke after he realized that Sakura would never like him and that she was whore with a big forehead. But he had never imagined that Sasuke was gay. The only thing he could do right now was stare at Sasuke and try to understand why he had kissed him.

Before Naruto could think anymore, Sasuke had dragged them into the Uchiha Mansion. Sasuke pulled him up the stairs into his bedroom and pushed him onto the bed and began kissing Naruto again, but this time more passionately.

"Sasuke, what are you doing?" Naruto managed to get out.

"Making you mine." Sasuke replied simply as he began pulling at the hem of Naruto's shirt. He pulled it off and threw it to the other side of the room. Naruto continued staring at the Uchiha in disbelief. As he began kissing Naruto again, he started kissing back melting into it. Naruto started to yank at Sasuke's shirt begging to get it off. Sasuke smacked his hand away and began to kiss his way down Naruto's neck listening to all the mewls that came from the smaller boy's mouth. Sasuke stopped at a spot on Naruto's neck and began biting and sucking, trying to make a mark. Once that was accomplished, he started moving his way down Naruto's chest. His hands moving lower trying to pull off the blonde boy's pants for more access to his semi-hard member.

"Hn, looks like I'm not going to be the only one to enjoy this." Sasuke smirked while patting Naruto's erect member through his boxers. He smirked even wider when he saw the blush spreading across the blond boy's face.

"Sasuke, that's not fair! You're still wearing all your clothes." Naruto complained while pulling at Sasuke's shirt again. He succeeded in pulling it off and threw it to the other side of the room along with Sasuke's pants. The only thing left to cover their throbbing erections were very thin boxers.

Sasuke continued to kiss the down the smaller boy's chest and stopped to dip his tongue into Naruto's navel. The small boy moaned out loud when he felt Sasuke's hand gripping him through his boxers.

"Naruto, I think these are gonna get in our way." Sasuke stated as he pulled off both of their boxers. Naruto stared at Sasuke's larger member and back down to his own, comparing, when he realized something.

"Uhm Sasuke, there is no freakin' way that, that thing is gonna fit up my ass." Naruto declared.

The raven-haired boy looked at the kitsune for a second before replying, "Well if you could get that giant stick out of my ass, why wouldn't my cock fit in your ass(2)?"

Not waiting for an answer, Sasuke wordlessly spread Naruto's legs apart as he sat between them. He bent down and gave a small lick to the fully erect cock in front of his face.

"Please Sasuke, no teasing. I just want you inside me, _now_." Naruto begged his soon to be lover.

"As you wish my little Naru-chan." Sasuke whispered huskily in to Naruto's ear. The blonde blushed harder at the new nickname.

The raven-haired boy leaned back down and grabbed a tube of lube from a new-by dresser draw. Sasuke slicked up three fingers and pressed one past the tight ring of muscles at Naruto's entrance. Naruto squirmed at the new feeling, but before he could get used to it, a second finger was entered. The blonde yelped at the intrusion as a shock of pain went up and down his spine. Tear threatened to fall down Naruto's face, but he bit his lip and held them back.

Sasuke began stretching Naruto by making a scissoring motion with his fingers. Naruto winced at the pain and screamed out as the third finger was finally added. The larger boy began thrusting his fingers in and out searching for a certain bundle of nerves. Once that spot was found, Naruto shrieked out in pleasure again and again as Sasuke continued to slam it with his fingers.

Much to Naruto's dismay, Sasuke pulled his fingers out earning a growl of protest from the blonde boy. Sasuke smirked and grabbed the tube of lube again. He lathered a generous amount onto his throbbing cock and placed it at Naruto's entrance, but paused to look for any signs of regret on Naruto's face. He saw none.

"Naruto, are you sure you're okay with this?" Sasuke questioned.

"Yes, I want this more than anything." Naruto answered honestly while pulling Sasuke's head up for a passionate kiss. After they broke apart, lips still lightly touching, Naruto whispered, "Make love to me Sasuke."

The raven could only nod as he kissed his way back down Naruto's body. He slowly pushed in until he was in to the hilt. After a minute or so, Naruto nodded after getting used to the feeling of Sasuke's larger cock filling him. Sasuke pulled out quickly and slammed back in. Naruto's hands found their way into Sasuke's soft black locks and gripped them tightly. It wasn't long before the pain was replaced by pleasure and Sasuke had Naruto screaming the larger boy's name at the top of his lungs.

"Sasuke… harder! Faster!" Naruto panted out.

Sasuke complied and picked up his pace, slamming harder into the blonde, thrusting against Naruto's prostate over and over. After each abusing hit to those bundles of nerves, Naruto could have sworn that he was seeing stars. Naruto's breathing picked up and Sasuke knew that neither of them would last much longer, so he tightly gripped Naruto's cock and began to pump it in rhythm to his thrusts. Only a few seconds later Naruto cummed onto Sasuke's hand. After feeling the tight heat and the walls of Naruto's passage clamp around he cummed inside of Naruto with a yell of the blonde's name. Sasuke pulled out and laid down next to Naruto on his side so they were face to face.

"I love you Naruto, more than anything." Sasuke said tiredly.

"I love you too, Sasuke, more than you know." Laughed Naruto.

"Night dobe…"

"Night teme…"

It wasn't long before sleep took over and they both peacefully fell into a deep slumber

END! R&R

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1) Yeah I was way too lazy to figure this out in yen so I used dollars.

2) Uhm this doesn't make sense, but when I was thinking it, it did so I used it.

Tell me if you like it! Hope you did! Okay at this point I don't care if anyone flames me. I just want honest opinions about my story.


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